ryan seacrest is an asshole.

Last night’s American Idol was certainly a shock for most of us.  Last year, the aftermath of Idol Gives Back left every contenstant in tact and alive for the next week.  However this year, the fate was not the same.  Hottie Aussie Michael Johns was eliminated from the show and somehow, despite my voodoo dolls and witchcraft spells (The hair from a newt’s belly!  One freckle from a toad!), Kristy Lee Cook and Syesha Mercado are still alive and kicking.  Not only was Michael kicked off, Ryan Seacrest was a rude asshole to him; giving him hope but then pushing him down again.

Honestly, there have been many instances where not winning American Idol has really worked out better for some of the artists involved.  Chris Daughtry, of course, is the shining example of that.  I just hope the same fate can meet Mr. Johns. 

I dont think there is anyone out there who can say he wasn’t talented, but he did have some identity issues as well as song choice issues.  To me, it’s hard to watch week after week with someone trying to figure out who they are.  I am just afraid that Carly Smithson very well might meet the same fate for the same reasons.  For me, there are a few folks on the show - Carly, Michael, and Syesha are perfect examples - that seem to get to about a 92% every week.  They have great voices, almost pick the right songs…but just barely fall flat for some reason. 

Its just to the point now that really good people are going to start exiting the show.  It’s going to get to be a real cat-fight of song choice and pure arrangement that keeps people on.  Should be interesting!

idol recap: top 9.

Don’t get me wrong.  I am a huge fan of Dolly Parton.  There are few people in the music industry to stay relevant as long as she has and she has contributed more to music than a lot of people recognize.  Unfortunately, I don’t feel like her music translated well to American Idol last night.

 The favorites were good and the mediocre were mediocre.  My man, David Cook did well considering he had to transform Dolly into rock…and honestly, the performances of the night for me were David Archuleta (admittedly, I was disappointed when he did so well) and Michael Johns. 

Its hard to say who will go at this point.  Of course, I am hoping for Ramiele to get the screws put to her, but America keeps surprising me.  Kristy Lee Cook could have taken better advantage of a country genre week, in my option.  Brooke White rushed Jolene too much.  Syesha and Jason Castro were pretty boring.  Carly actually did well and sounded pretty, but Simon was right - who dressed her this week?  Did she come straight from tending bar?

All in all, I was pretty disappointed this week.  I know it was a tough theme but still, I was hoping for some killer performances that we get 2-3 of each week.  I guess David Cook can’t be sheer perfection every week.  Again, I hope it’s Ramiele.  She is the least talented of the group.  Her and Kristy Lee.  America…I hope you did the right thing.  It’d be a real shame if I had to kick everyone’s ass in America, one at a time.  I am a busy, important lady and that would take a long ass time.

NOTE: David Cook was rushed to the hospital last night with heart palpitations.  Word is that my soulmate…I mean uh, Cook, is fine now.  I think he shouldn’t be looking at pictures of me.  That tends to do it to the guys.

week two: american idol recap.

Wow, after I went to therapy and I got my shiznits ironed out I was feeling like a million bucks and articulate about my feelings.  Then I watched the Idol girls take the stage and I got all PPBBLLLLTTFFFT *garble garble* again. 

I still maintain that this year might be the best so far in regards to the talent they found for the show.  It’s just hard to pick out the diamonds in a case full of jewelry.  They are all totally decent, but no one, on the girls side, has really stepped up and made the impression you need to to be THE American Idol. 

Don’t get me wrong.  There are some girls that I really like - but none of them have had the performance of a lifetime yet.  Carly Smithson is so Irish and cute and really has a killer voice - but seems to be performing to something like 92% of her potential.  With Heart, you can “go there” and she didn’t quite get there, for me.  Almost though.  Amanda Overmyer, despite her undefinable performance last night, is very likeable, smart and an entity that the competition needs.  She just needs to pick songs she feels comfortable with instead of taking the judges SO literally that she never does anything in her wheelhouse.  When you can pick ANYTHING from a decade, you need to take advantage of it before you are stuck having to pick a country song, or doing Sinatra.  Syesha Mercado is cute and fun and has great range and control - but then it felt like she walked us through figurative mud last night with her Billy Paul song.  So many of the girls were just…a wash and I almost struggle, even with my unhealthy obsession with Idol for seven years, to remember what everyone sings each night.

To me, it’s all for the guys to lose.  First and foremost, whether you get him or not, David Archuleta is un-fuckin’-believable.  He’s so young, has so much control, so much maturity, it dwarfs most everyone else in the competition.  I am a total Beatle-phile, I know, but at the same time, I don’t like to hear people cover the Fabbest of the Fab because of the perfection that once was 30 years ago.  But he nailed it.  David Cook (despite his chameleon hair) knows exactly who he is and is one of the few contestants who picks the right songs; All Right Now by Free was so cool and not to use Paula’s trite phrase, but it was very relevant to today.  Michael Johns (though his song choice might have been weird with Fleetwood Mac this week) has the stage presence of a Jim Morrison….a Michael Hutchence, a Bono…and just needs to get in the groove and HE could take the competition.  Even one of the least-favorites of last week, Chikizie, blew the roof off the place this week with Donny Hathaway.  Shit, even Luke Menard almost showed some personality.

Tonight, I think it’s a bit of a crapshoot as to who gets booted off.  Kady Malloy has got to go.  I don’t know how many weeks we need to tell her to find her own voice.  I’m tired of waiting for her to figure it out.  And Luke Menard for the guys has to be in the bottom 4. 

The other two will be hard to pick.  Alexandrea might be the one for the girls, though I like how she makes what was old, new again.  Or maybe even Kristy Lee Cook or Brooke White.  For the guys, I hate to say it, because my dad feels like he’s the son he never had or something - but I think Jason Yeager has got to go.  So cute, but so….white bread.  You don’t show how much “soul” you have by singing the Doobie Brothers.  It’s like talking about your street cred while you bump around the hood in your Buick LeSabre.  It’s like talking about your diet while you scarf down Big Macs.  FAIL.  Or maybe it might be David Hernandez.  What did he sing?  Exactly.  and Robbie Carrico - he’s going to Kady Malloy route.  Great voice, no doubt.  But who is he? 

What’s your take?  Comment after the jump and let’s watch tonight and see what happens.

review: american idol - first week

OK, I give in.  I have to write more about American Idol.  I can’t restrain myself anymore.

I am in agreement with a lot of folks that this year might have the best group of consistenly good performers.  In all honesty, since Josiah’s departure, I don’t know who I am REALLY invested in, because a huge majority of the people are SO good.  After this week’s performances, I have to say my favorites are Carly Smithson (though I wasn’t a fan of her song choice), Michael Johns (Hi, you did the Doors.  I love you.), Amanda Overmeyer (I don’t care what anyone says, she rocks) and Jason Castro (thought I am not totally sold on the dreds). 

Of course, there were a lot of other people I really liked too.  I thought that Alexandrea Lushington was so brave to attempt old white dude song “Spinning Wheel”.  She reminded me a lot of Alicia Keys, taking something so old and making it new again.  How can you not like David Archuleta?  So cute!  Of course Ramiele Mumbay and Asia’h Epperson really picked up the talent level last night after a poor start to the ladies’ showcase..and as old-fashioned as he was, I want to be friends with Jason Yeager and Robbie Carrico.  And Danny Noriega with the Elvis!  He was having a blast.

Unfortunately there were some people who fell short for me.  Luke Menard, Garrett Haley - I just didn’t get it.  And as much as I like Chikezie Eze, he put me to sleep too.  As for the girls, I hate to say it, but I think Joanne Borgello and Amy Davis are out tonight.  Kristy Lee Cook and Kady Malloy kind of bored me too though.  And I will continue to root for Brooke White because looks just like Sue Deardowski, except with a huge blonde wig.

 

My opinion, it’s the guys to lose this year.  What an outstanding group.  What are your thoughts? 

and…

I am borderline PISSED 4 LYF about Josiah Leming getting booted off of American Idol last night.  Of course, this year…there are so many great talents, cool personalities, etc.  But MAN.  He was my little homeboy.

Being that I am Irish and proud, I guess I will be a full-on Carly Smithson fan now.  But I am still convinced it will be a guy who wins.  Who do you think?  Of the guys, I definitely think that Michael Johns, the Australian, probably has the most natural, rockstar charisma.  Robbie Carrico and David Archuleta totally have the voices though.  Syesha Mercado?  A Mini-Aretha.  Amanda Overmeyer?  A welcome carbon copy flashback of Grace Slick and Janis.

Its still going to be a good show.  I just wish Josiah was there.