At first, I didn’t like the idea of the SM watching adult content on TV and I certainly did not want him purchasing such movies on Pay Per View. I am not a porn prude by any stretch, but as he was getting acclamated down here with his job and with me….and we didn’t have the money coming in right off the bat. I thought our money would be better spent on food and bills over titties and bush. Besides, it was a small criticism on my character (justified or not), making me feel like I wasn’t holding my own. I was all about watching it if we could do it together, but he seemed so private about it, so that forced me to take it even more personally. Broads are so dumb sometimes.
After further consideration, fatter paychecks and our attempts to keep the relationship fresh, I deemed it tolerable for the SM to do a little “research” here and there, so long as he kept it in moderation. While we have a very open, honest relationship and keep very little from each other if anything, he has a shy streak when it comes to watching porn together. I understand that it can be a personal thing, so I told him that was cool, but I I also told him to talk about it if he wants. It’s not like he has to report back..but him being more open about it, even if he kind of feels private about watching it…would really help me understand and rationalize it. If he brought ideas back, I guess it felt like he was watching it for legitimate reasons that I could stomach. So far, the test has been successful, mostly in part to a little conversation we had the other day.
We were sitting on the couch before his ball game yesterday and he said, “Ya know that “research” I did the other day? That was the worst movie ever. This chick…she was with three guys…all separately, of course….”
“Thats not a given, baby. It’s porn.”
“Ahh….Good point, she coulda been…uh….”
“She coulda been doing a lot of things.”
“Yeah…..at any rate, she was with three separate guys in three separate situations..and every time, she said, ‘Oh you’re so big and this is nothing like i ever felt before.’ Why would she say that? That’s not true. She said it about the last guy!!!”
“Baby, you shouldn’t be watching porn for the dialogue. You’re missing the point.”
“I guess but…that just ruined it for me.”
I couldn’t help but laugh. Here I was thinking people watch porn to get hot, to get their rocks off and at worst, feed fetishes their sad, selfish, unexperimental significant other won’t fulfill. Now I know the truth: The objective of watching porn lays somewhere between those truths and realism in dialogue between characters.
Like they tell professional football players to “act like they’ve been there before” when they get to the big game - If you’re a pizza delivery boy or a pool boy, act like it. If you’re the town bicycle and 2 or 20 guys have already had their way with you in the first 20 minutes of the flick, act like you’ve been pearl necklaced before.
Your acting skills are already considerably below par, that’s why you’re still moonlighting at Hooters between your Vivid Entertainment shoots. At least make your dialogue believable, for Christ’s sake. You’re disappointing my boyfriend.
