ryan seacrest is an asshole.

Last night’s American Idol was certainly a shock for most of us.  Last year, the aftermath of Idol Gives Back left every contenstant in tact and alive for the next week.  However this year, the fate was not the same.  Hottie Aussie Michael Johns was eliminated from the show and somehow, despite my voodoo dolls and witchcraft spells (The hair from a newt’s belly!  One freckle from a toad!), Kristy Lee Cook and Syesha Mercado are still alive and kicking.  Not only was Michael kicked off, Ryan Seacrest was a rude asshole to him; giving him hope but then pushing him down again.

Honestly, there have been many instances where not winning American Idol has really worked out better for some of the artists involved.  Chris Daughtry, of course, is the shining example of that.  I just hope the same fate can meet Mr. Johns. 

I dont think there is anyone out there who can say he wasn’t talented, but he did have some identity issues as well as song choice issues.  To me, it’s hard to watch week after week with someone trying to figure out who they are.  I am just afraid that Carly Smithson very well might meet the same fate for the same reasons.  For me, there are a few folks on the show - Carly, Michael, and Syesha are perfect examples - that seem to get to about a 92% every week.  They have great voices, almost pick the right songs…but just barely fall flat for some reason. 

Its just to the point now that really good people are going to start exiting the show.  It’s going to get to be a real cat-fight of song choice and pure arrangement that keeps people on.  Should be interesting!

idol recap: top 9.

Don’t get me wrong.  I am a huge fan of Dolly Parton.  There are few people in the music industry to stay relevant as long as she has and she has contributed more to music than a lot of people recognize.  Unfortunately, I don’t feel like her music translated well to American Idol last night.

 The favorites were good and the mediocre were mediocre.  My man, David Cook did well considering he had to transform Dolly into rock…and honestly, the performances of the night for me were David Archuleta (admittedly, I was disappointed when he did so well) and Michael Johns. 

Its hard to say who will go at this point.  Of course, I am hoping for Ramiele to get the screws put to her, but America keeps surprising me.  Kristy Lee Cook could have taken better advantage of a country genre week, in my option.  Brooke White rushed Jolene too much.  Syesha and Jason Castro were pretty boring.  Carly actually did well and sounded pretty, but Simon was right - who dressed her this week?  Did she come straight from tending bar?

All in all, I was pretty disappointed this week.  I know it was a tough theme but still, I was hoping for some killer performances that we get 2-3 of each week.  I guess David Cook can’t be sheer perfection every week.  Again, I hope it’s Ramiele.  She is the least talented of the group.  Her and Kristy Lee.  America…I hope you did the right thing.  It’d be a real shame if I had to kick everyone’s ass in America, one at a time.  I am a busy, important lady and that would take a long ass time.

NOTE: David Cook was rushed to the hospital last night with heart palpitations.  Word is that my soulmate…I mean uh, Cook, is fine now.  I think he shouldn’t be looking at pictures of me.  That tends to do it to the guys.

review: the mens’ 80s night on idol.

Continuing the preaching about my unhealthy obsession with American Idol, I have to say last night was a mixed bag for me on American Idol.  It was weird, because while I was not raised on 80s music, despite being born in 1980 (my folks were into Stevie, Beach Boys, CCR and the like), I was blown away by some people’s song choices and performances.

Number one, with a bullet, was David Cook’s “Hello” by Lionel Richie, without a doubt.  When he first came out with the guitar, I was worried that he might be a one trick pony and bore us this week after really wowing us last week with Free’s “All Right Now.”  But the SM and I sat there, slack-jawed and in awe of his rendition of such a poppy, whiney song from a light rock giant such as Lionel.  I couldn’t help to think about what that blind sculptor chick in the video would have thought.

Second place for me was definitely Jason Castro, with his vulnerable, sweet interpretation of “Hallelujah” by Jeff Buckley/Leonard Cohen.  I like to pride myself as a music buff and believe it or not, I had never experienced Jeff Buckley until last night.  I don’t know what the fuck I was doing before last night.  What a song.  After the show, we got the computer out and downloaded some Jeff Buckley.  I am hooked.

Some people who I think did extremely well, but didn’t give the performances of their lives were Michael Johns and David Archuleta.  Of course they are front-runners.  Of course the have an unbelievable instrument.  But Michael Johns needs to find the perfect song.  And David Archuleta needs to quit being so…serious.  At 17, you should be thinking about things other than the plight of the homeless.

David Hernandez?  I can’t stop thinking about the stripping thing.  He is tainted for me.  Speaking of tainted, Danny Noriega, while SO cute and the personality of the show, he admittedly did a pretty miserable version of “Tainted Love” by Soft Cell.  Don’t get me wrong; I love this cat.  But it just wasn’t a good performance vocally…and this is a singing competition. 

I am so over Luke Menard, though he probably had his best song choice decision last night with some Wham.  I just can’t help but think he’ll be going home tonight.  Him…and either Danny Noriega (sadly) or Chikezie.  For the life of me, I can’t even remember what he sang. 

Tonight, the women take on the 80s.  I can’t help but pray and hope that Carly does “Nothing Compares 2 U” by Sinead O’Connor.  The SM and I had a discussion abut this last night, as he thought that Prince released it later than 1989 and Sinead had it in the mid-90s.  I had to look it up though, and Prince wrote it in 1985 for “The Family”, a group to be just one more outlet for his talents, and Sinead got it down on wax in 1989, released it technically in 1990 on her album, “I Do Not Want What I Haven’t Got”..then with the popularity there, Prince released it in 1993 on a hits compliation as a duet with Rosie Gaines of the NPG. 

and I want Ramiele to do “Damn, I Wish I was Your Lover”….Crap.  That was 1992.   

We’ll see.  What do you want to hear the women sing?

review: american idol - first week

OK, I give in.  I have to write more about American Idol.  I can’t restrain myself anymore.

I am in agreement with a lot of folks that this year might have the best group of consistenly good performers.  In all honesty, since Josiah’s departure, I don’t know who I am REALLY invested in, because a huge majority of the people are SO good.  After this week’s performances, I have to say my favorites are Carly Smithson (though I wasn’t a fan of her song choice), Michael Johns (Hi, you did the Doors.  I love you.), Amanda Overmeyer (I don’t care what anyone says, she rocks) and Jason Castro (thought I am not totally sold on the dreds). 

Of course, there were a lot of other people I really liked too.  I thought that Alexandrea Lushington was so brave to attempt old white dude song “Spinning Wheel”.  She reminded me a lot of Alicia Keys, taking something so old and making it new again.  How can you not like David Archuleta?  So cute!  Of course Ramiele Mumbay and Asia’h Epperson really picked up the talent level last night after a poor start to the ladies’ showcase..and as old-fashioned as he was, I want to be friends with Jason Yeager and Robbie Carrico.  And Danny Noriega with the Elvis!  He was having a blast.

Unfortunately there were some people who fell short for me.  Luke Menard, Garrett Haley - I just didn’t get it.  And as much as I like Chikezie Eze, he put me to sleep too.  As for the girls, I hate to say it, but I think Joanne Borgello and Amy Davis are out tonight.  Kristy Lee Cook and Kady Malloy kind of bored me too though.  And I will continue to root for Brooke White because looks just like Sue Deardowski, except with a huge blonde wig.

 

My opinion, it’s the guys to lose this year.  What an outstanding group.  What are your thoughts? 

and…

I am borderline PISSED 4 LYF about Josiah Leming getting booted off of American Idol last night.  Of course, this year…there are so many great talents, cool personalities, etc.  But MAN.  He was my little homeboy.

Being that I am Irish and proud, I guess I will be a full-on Carly Smithson fan now.  But I am still convinced it will be a guy who wins.  Who do you think?  Of the guys, I definitely think that Michael Johns, the Australian, probably has the most natural, rockstar charisma.  Robbie Carrico and David Archuleta totally have the voices though.  Syesha Mercado?  A Mini-Aretha.  Amanda Overmeyer?  A welcome carbon copy flashback of Grace Slick and Janis.

Its still going to be a good show.  I just wish Josiah was there.