Yeah. That sums it up.
I am not really at liberty to talk about something I heard today, but I had to get a little bit of the frustration off of my chest, while being as vague and non-disclosing as possible.
I am so disenchanted with some elements of my life right now that I am almost beside myself. I hate when people are thrown under buses, lied to, told half-truths to and left out of the loop when it comes down to their livelihood. I’m sick of the lack of allegiance to people who might be a small piece of your puzzle, but an integral part nonetheless. I am sick of people feeling like they aren’t needed and told they aren’t needed. I hate that they don’t arm us with a machete and leave out the fact that we are forced to face and somehow cut through a towering wall of bullshit.
Maybe I am just some naive, green kid who doesn’t get how the world really works and maybe I’m in for a lot of rude awakenings such as this. I just don’t want to live in a world where everyone only cares about themselves and there is no such thing as trust. I don’t want to bore kids into a world where I have to tell them that no matter how good and righteous they are, they’ll still get plowed in the ass on the whim of someone with more power and more money than them. I don’t want to tell them that one day, it might be me, operating without their best interests in mind. I hate to think that I’d ever turn into…”one of them”.
It breaks my heart sometimes to think about how the world really is, outside of a stolen glance across the room from the SM, a hot bubble bath, petting my dog’s soft ears and a good night of sleep. Outside of this bubble, the world can be a cold, cruel place in which leaning can’t be an option. What can we do to keep from turning into ‘one of them”; the cold and calculating, the self-important and the habitually selfish?
